The Eastern European Bloc Perverts' Anthem

Every culture has music to call their own, except the Canadians, who got Avril Lavigne from the Devil. And from this music they have, they allocate them to different situations. For example, national anthems are made so that sportspeople think it's okay for them to be watched and voyeured upon by millions of people. Love songs are made so people will commit suicide, therefore keeping the population under control.

In every culture, there is also the perverts' anthem. America itself, in reflection of its culture, has millions of Pervert Anthems, such as I Want It That Way, sung by the Backstreet Boys about their bedroom activities (The lyric "Tell me why, ain't nothing but a heartache" about Howie D's semen going down the wrong way after AJ blew him. That's why they "never wanna hear you say, 'I want it that way'").

Similarly, the Latinos have Ricky Martin's Shake Your Bon-Bon. Malays have Semoga Bahagia, which is about paedophilia.

Due to horrible prioritisation, in which the government of the nations of the Easter European bloc set aside more money for sex-change operations than music, Eastern Europe faces a dire lack of Perverts' Anthems. Therefore, I shall lend them my services as a songwriter and write this hard rock anthem for them, which I entitle...

I Want To Sex You

(in deep, guttural Eastern European voice)
(chorus)
I want to sex you!
I want to sex you!
Sex you like teletubby
Sex you to the left
Sex you to the right
Sex you like we are war comrades
In the name of Gorbachev,
Sex you all the night!

(verse)
Schizer, you wear short skirt
I like
Schizer, when I see lamb
I eat
Schizer, when my stomach full
I shit
Schizer, I look up skirt
I say in fake British accent,
"I need to do things in a very private place
That concerns my left hand"

Schizer, I like porn of 80-year-old
Women
Schizer, I like when horse and girl
Making sex
Schizer, I like to see many naked many
Midget
But Schizer, don't telling me how much
I owe tax

(repeat chorus)