Nas

This is a tribute collage to tomorrow's birthday boy, Nasruddin (pictured above), a man of great moral strength and a revered member of the SJIM and a significant player in TLFC. Born on the 13th of December 1986, he more than fairly represents the Sagittarian traits of rabid energy and uninhibition. So I interviewed some people and here's what they have to say about one of my best friends, my cousin's cousin's cousin, Nas...

Aisyah:
dear nas, when i first looked at you, i admit the first thing that came to mind wasn't: "Eh macam Peter Crouch ah dia main bola." You may be no CROUCHing Tiger but you're a Hidden Dragon when it comes to soccer. Keep the stuff going on the pitch man. And talk to me, for once =D

Note from Suff: There are two teams that have better U-12 teams than senior teams: Liverpool and Liverpool Reserves.

Mus:
Nas is a terrifying beast whose noise output is indirectly proportionate to his size; perhaps only his giant member can match up to it. He is a loyal friend and a hardworking um worker, and his recent one liners which has progressed to more than beating people up brings a cheer to our faces whether intelligent or not.

P.S.:Nas, I swear we ARE helllooo gila tebiat nak mampos omgwtfbbq. Hence our lack of satays, amashaaam

General Pervez Musharraf, Resident Madman, Pakistan:
Nas is the epitome of this country. We may appear small and unable to inflict pain unto our enemies, but you guys never knew what kecil-kecil cili padi meant right

Suff (me):
When I first got to know Nas, it was in religious class. It was towards the end of the year and we just got back our year-end exam results. He got first in class. I got second. That may not be the case for the rest of our lives, but nevertheless since that day, I always saw Nas as someone anybody can look up to, and wholeheartedly respect. Provided his mouth remains shut.

Amy:
nas, you're such a pendiam that i've not spoken more than 3 words to you in the time span of 3 years that i've known you. So takpe. now aku dah berbual banyak, and i just wanna wish you happy birthdayyy! lain kali cakap sikit ah. dah ah. bye.

Baba:
among the SJI satays, i think i like NAS bestttttttt..cos he's so low-profile, unlike the limelight-stealing Suff, 'motherly' Nazeer who 'loves' to suap his anak who is Suff btw, i-am-so-sensible-but-can-be-merepek-at-times Aizat, or i-have-a-fetish-for-rgs-girls Mus. hahaha. Nas is such a brilliant hockey player, my eyes popped out whenever i watched him play, and i couldn't even blink a second. haha. anyway, happy 19th birthday Nas. keep your cool, but amy and i have yet to witness you be merepek like the rest of the satays. haha

Dmitri Sukmadikov, Sex Addict:
17 inches. 17 inches! And I'm not talking about his monitor width.

Austin Powers, Bed-Hopper:
And I thought I was the only dude who could make women really go "Yeah baby yeahh" in bed. Two words Nas: Oooh, behave.

Rafa Benitez, Manager, Liverpool Football Club
First of all, Suffian can eat my shorts. Now to the matter at hand. Nas. I offered the lad a 7-year contract with a weekly salary of 120 000 pounds. He reminds me of Diao the Great Graeme Souness (as a player, not a manager) which is why I offered him so much. But Nas rejected this offer! He said "Sorry, but NS comes first Beni. We all love our country, sure you understand that." What a blow for this club to have missed out on his talent. Size does not reflect talent.

Aizat:
Baik Nas. Me and you on pitch can only be as good as Salif and Igor. Thats sad ah nas but nevermind. Buat skills je tau, asalkan lubang je da happy tapi goal tak de. Kalau goal pun time kita kalah. On a more serious note, Nas has been the best friend that you can ask for bak pepatah bola keranjang di command post. Happy Birthday Nas. I used to like 17.... until you and Nazir came along.