Movies are very much like deranged magpies. Some come with little trinkets of brilliance. The trinkets would be stolen, of course, but witnesses wouldn't think of that. They would think of how the magpies soar magnificently, the jewellery in their hands (or claws, whatever) gleaming in the sun. Same with today's blockbusters, especially that bit about stolen trinkets.
Some magpies are butt ugly, but when they fly, it is a sweet mix of aerodynamics and aesthetically-pleasing backdrops. Much like arthouse flicks and foreign films.
Okay enough of comparing movies with deranged magpies. Newcastle United fans would fill my mailbox with enough hate mail to burst. Let me just get to the point.
2005, in film, is the same as the different kinds of magpies we see. But let me choose my top 10 magpies shall I?
Top 10 Films of 2005
10) Mr & Mrs Smith (you know that scene where they try to kill one another, and then they make really really passionate love? Classic...)
9) Be Cool (It is nice to see Uma Thurman in a nice, non-violent movie. It is euphoric to see The Rock act as a gay dude. Comedic masterpiece.)
8) Kung Fu Hustle (following subtitles can get irritating, but the physical comedy and that quaint dance at the opening is worth it.)
7) Into The Blue (3 words: Bikini. Alba. Jessica.)
6) King Kong (While it is interesting to see a lookalike of my best friend Nazir on screen, it is just as interesting to see how this one would improve on the previous 2 King Kongs. Stupendous graphics and animation, blondes who are actually interesting to watch, I'd say it is a more than 100% improvement.)
5) Saw 2 (Violent. Intelligent. My kinda movie, baby)
4) The Longest Yard (Again, Chris Rock's presence in any movie will make me want to watch it. But combine that with Adam Sandler, Nelly, and that black dude from White Chicks over-advertising McDonald's, and you get the epitome of popular cultural madness. I mean, brilliance.)
3) Madagascar (Chris Rock, Ali G in the same movie. Ross - okay, David Schwimmer - as a giraffe. The dynamics in this movie are enough for me to buy the DVD despite being from the inappropriate demographic.)
2) Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire (Movie doesn't live up to the book, but the book's heavenly, and the movie's just slightly below that)
1) Star Wars Episode 3: Revenge Of The Sith (Box office earnings don't lie. Neither do legions of fanboys. Neither does my taste in movies. This one isn't a magpie. It's a giant, elegant, magnificent bald - in tribute to Anakin Skywalker at the end of the movie - eagle)
May 2006 give me an even better top 10 list.
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