I'm sure there are more than 15 things I will never do, but right now I find these 15 most distasteful, and most unfortunately at the forefront of my mind. Why am I thinking of 15 things I will never do? Well, I was bored.
Okay so I will never, ever for the life of me...
15. Go naked go-karting.
14. Eat cigarette ash.
13. Say 'vaginal sores' more than twice consecutively. (Second time allowed in case person I'm speaking to did not hear me first time. If said person does not hear me the second time round, I will say 'Get your ears checked' rather than 'vaginal sores'.)
12. Wear faded oversized briefs.
11. Flash someone without AT LEAST trimming my pubes prior.
10. Scratch my ass and then eat my food.
09. Get fat.
08. Masturbate in public.
07. Read Sweet Valley High/University/Community College.
06. Pass off a strand of my pubic hair as a birthday present (just that one time Mus it'll never happen again).
05. Watch pterodactyl porn.
04. Name my son Yvonne.
03. Get turned on by a cow urinating.
02. Make love to a raccoon.
01. Go to a Halloween party dressed up as the pink ranger.
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