[Cinco]Fracture Lecture: Based On A True Story

Begin with the end in mind is a bagload of shit. The only time anybody should have an end in mind is if they're in the anal porn industry. Otherwise, 'beginning with the end in mind' is meant to stay in the backwaters of unread self-help books, along with 'If you assume, you will make an ASS of U and ME' and 'Ask and you shall receive'. In today's context of financial complexities it's more of 'Ask and you shall receive, with interest'.

Now back to the story. The end Suffian has in mind is this: the Lizard stops its destructive inclinations. How? Now that evaded Suffian's mind. Racking his brains for a means to achieve the end, Suffian came up with usual way of dealing with conflicts of interests: diplomacy.

"Hey big boy!" he called to the Lizard through the Intra-dimensional airwaves.

The Lizard was very angry at such arrogance from someone who caused him tremendous pain with a single magick beam. And due to his complex mental infrastructure, everytime the Lizard gets angry, he starts to rap:

"Hey you dick whom they call Suff/
Get out of here or I shall MAKE you move/
They don't call me Susan the Bitch in Dimension Beta 5 for nothing/
Just let me be, let me do my thing/
I'm gonna eat everyone here, plus the rest of the world/
I wouldn't even exclude a single Spice Girl/
So while your beam was nice and white and stuff/
It won't stop me from being a difficult bitch like Damien Duff."

Using mental telepathic projection - an ability reserved only to those who can control the magick within them, Suffian gave him his own ghetto retort:

"Uh, Everybody across the dimensions put your hands in the air/
Put your hands in the air/
Uh, here it goes.../
Thank god I have my own mic, 'cos the other's got Lizard breath/
This rap battle's gonna be a fight to tha death/
You wanna come here and talk about eating people, bitch/
Well I've got news for you, you pubic-hair-of-a-witch/
Thai people would eat you in hot dog buns with chilli/
Little kids are gonna sew you up into Prada handbags in Bali/
Americans are gonna cut your head up, stuff it, and hang it on walls/
Did I mention that the Thai people may also eat your balls?/
You wanna give me schtick, well suck a goat's dick/
Chinamen are gonna use your pubic hair to make candle wicks/
Russians are gonna make jackets of your hide/
Don't even think about landing in zoo, finding a mate, do a Bonnie and Clyde/
Cos even if I show your ugly ass some mercy/
Don't expect mercy from those to come after me.
Peace out.
Bukit Panjang forever y'all."

The Lizard gave an angry snarl. Suffian did two things: got Mr. Tight to talk to him again, and he looked at a guy with bad teeth..

Magick happened....